Stopping Traffic

Think Tank #12

Sometimes the little annoyances in our day can offer us our greatest insights.

So, for some context, I ‘jaywalk’ at least twice per day—something that probably causes some annoyance to the drivers that are passing.

It’s like a little ritual. Every day, during my break at work, I go to the little deli directly across the street. Of course, since crossing at the light would involve walking halfway down the block and then back again, I just cross in the middle. Who wouldn’t?

Sometimes the light is red, which makes crossing easy. Of course, I rarely get this lucky, so usually I have to wait for an opening. I’m prone to impatience, so I often do this a bit ‘aggressively,’ positioning myself just slightly in front of two parked cars as I wait for the traffic to pass and the light to change.

If you’re not from New York, don’t crucify me. It’s normal around here. I’ve gone to other states and pulled this same exact ‘move’ only for cars to stop and stare daggers at me as they wait for me to pass. One time, while on vacation, John and I were verbally admonished for this behavior by a crossing guard, who let us know that such selfishness was abhorrent and not welcome in the great state of Maine.

So, to clarify, I’m not asking for special treatment. No one ever stops for a jaywalker in New York City.

However, what they often do (which inspired the ‘little annoyance’ that inspired this post) is slow down for one.

I never understood this. I don’t know how many times I’ve waited for a single car to pass only for them to slow down to a crawl but not stop, only for me to miss the opening as another several cars came speeding along after them. It’s like they’re making sure I’m not going to jump out in front of their car, or something. And I get it, I guess—we’ve all heard the horror stories about people diving in front of vehicles seeking insurance claims. Maybe it’s a means of self-preservation.

More likely, though, it’s just a symptom of indecision. Not knowing whether to stop or to go, they choose the halfway point and slow down, accomplishing the worst outcomes of both.

This brings me to my point. We spend so much time laboring over our decisions, trying to pick the ‘right’ thing to do. But often, the best course of action is just to pick something and commit to it.

Be confident in your decisions, whether you know that the decision is correct or not. There are two outcomes: you’re either right, or you’re wrong.

If you’re right, being right and confident gets you a whole lot farther than being right and unsure of yourself—your insecurity just makes you appear wrong.

If you’re wrong—well, if you’re unsure and wrong, then you’re just plain wrong. But if you’re wrong and confident, your error will often go unnoticed. The term “fake it till you make it” had to come from somewhere.

So drivers, for the love of God, if you see someone trying to find a gap in the traffic, either stop or go. You’re not helping anyone by stalling.

And everyone else, live potently. Success is all about confidence. Even if you have no idea what you’re doing, if you act like you do, people generally won’t be able to tell the difference.